Just For Laugh

This came from Mental Hospital‎

Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day, while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank like a stone to the bottom and stayed there. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out. When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act, he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as he now considered her to be mentally stable .When he went to tell her the news, he said, "Mary, I have good news & bad news. The good news is you're being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you've regained your senses". "The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hanged himself in the bathroom with the belt of his robe. I am so sorry, but he's dead". Mary replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry"

When 2 Name Meet (English and Chinese)

Lee Sum Wan : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?
Mr. Saw Lee : Yes, you can speak to me.
Lee Sum Wan : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
Mr. Saw Lee : You are talking to someone! Who is this?
Lee Sum Wa : I'm Sum Wan .And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.
Mr. Saw Lee : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone!But what's this urgent matter about?
Lee Sum Wan : Well just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother, Noe Wan, was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.
Mr. Saw Lee : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital from the accident that isn't an urgent matter!You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!
Lee Sum Wan : You are so rude! Who are you?
Mr. Saw Lee : I'm Saw Lee.
Lee Sum Wan : You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

Englishmen Convention

80,000 Englishmen meet in the Old Trafford stadium, for a "Englishmen Are Not Stupid" Convention.
The leader says, "We are all here today to prove to the world that Englishmen are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?"
A Englishmen gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage.The leader asks him, "What is 15 plus 15?"
After 15 or 20 seconds he says, "Eighteen!"
Obviously everyone is a little disappointed.
Then 80,000 Englishmen start cheering, "Give him another chance! Give him another chance!"
The leader says, "Well since we've gone to the trouble of getting 80,000 of you in one place and we have the worldwide press and global broadcastmedia here, uh, I guess we can give him another chance."So he asks, "What is 5 plus 5?"
After nearly 30seconds he eventually says, "Ninety?"
The leader is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected.Sigh!
Everyone is disheartened, the Englishmen starts crying and the 80,000 Englishmen begin to yell and wave their hands shouting,"GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!"
The leader, unsure whether or not he is doing more than damage, eventually says, "Ok! Ok! Just one more chance.
What is 2 plus 2? The Englishmen closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, "Four"
Throughout the stadium pandemonium breaks out as all 80,000 Englishmen jump to their feet,wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream.
"GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!"GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!